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They should call it Volgue-ar

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“I think it might be time for a little nip tuck around my eyes.”

You nearly choke on your latte, “That’s ridiculous. We’re too young.” But, in reality, you’re not completely sure if this is true anymore.

You watch your best friend pull at the skin around her eyes and say with a frown, “Things are starting to sag.”

“I’m not listening to you.”

She pushes the month’s Vogue across the table, jostling your water glass as she adds, “She’s our age, you know?”

You know. She’s told you nearly a thousand times about the unbelievable similarities between herself and the Kardashian sisters. Her favorite was on the cover of Vogue this month, though you barely lift your eyes to look.

“I heard she lives around here.” You add, just to appear interested.

“Yeah. Somewhere on 23rd Street.”

“I’ll bet her place is horribly tacky.”

“Probably…” She trails off, but you imagine she feels otherwise.

You peek out the window towards the urban swarm of a Saturday afternoon in summertime. You can barely see the pavement with all the busy bodies bouncing around from one corner of the island to another.

She continues to read Vogue with intensity and pull at the skin around her eyes, confirming, “It’s time. I’m gonna make a call this week.” You wonder, why such vulgar, unashamed adoration for celebrities at this stage in our lives? and point to the magazine, “Vogue…” you say smirking, “They should call it Volgue-ar,” although she does not seem amused.

“OH. MY. GOD.” Your best friend squeals at a pitch audible only to dogs and birds as the door swings open and a Kardashian, her Kardashian approaches the counter.  “I must say hi.”

Before you can protest, she’s running towards her with grand hand gestures. You watch your best friend giggle, placing a hand on the Kardashian’s arm, whose eyes remain hidden behind sunglasses the size of skyscrapers on her polished face. You point your eyes down, pretending to read Vogue.

 

This piece has been submitted to Week Seventeen of the Trifecta Challenge. For more information about the Trifecta Challenge, please visit their homepage.

 

 

14 comments

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  1. Second person narrative is difficult to maintain. You did a wonderful job with this piece.

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    • abby

      Thank you, Tara!

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  2. This is really good! I like how you didn’t stick with the usual third or first person, because it really added to the originality of your short story!

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    • abby

      Thanks! I’m glad you liked it.

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  3. karen

    I actually laughed out loud at the Vogue-er thing. Very clever. Also an interesting use of the prompt in social commentary. So far away from my life, but I know it is out there … well played!

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    • abby

      Thanks, Karen! I enjoy writing social commentary and this one just jumped out at me. Glad you laughed at the Volgue-ar thing :)

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  4. I could feel the humiliation for my best friend, even though she was just a character in a story. The Kardashians are perfect fodder for “Vulgar”, too.

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    • abby

      I’m pleased to hear that you felt the story in such a personal way. Thanks, Jessie!

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  5. abby

    Thanks, Trifecta! I’m pleased to hear the narrative worked, and you enjoyed the little details of the story. This is my first challenge and I’ll certainly be back for more.

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  6. Loved this – Love how she feels isolated and disconnected from her friend, but then studies Vogue in order to hide.

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    • abby

      I’m glad you enjoyed that last little detail. Thanks!

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  7. Dana

    Such a clever take on the prompt and excellent depiction of the all-too-common competitive obsession with air-brushed beauty so many of us women have… “Volgue-ar” indeed! Made me smile and frown all at once… maybe I should consider a little nip tuck. Heh. 😉

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    • abby

      Thanks, Dana. I’m pleased to hear that you enjoyed the broader social context of the piece.

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  8. Good for you.

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